April Day 5

Just a quick post before the day is gone to share a spread from my Quote Journal.  I love this quote!

This page was a fun one to do!  I printed my head image, colored it with Prismacolor Pencils and cut it out.  I found a page in a catalog that matched it in size and cut that out.  For the background on the journal pages, I inked the background, stenciled a little, stamped a little and glued everything down.  It was really simple but is one of my favorite pages.  I find it peaceful.  See you tomorrow!

peace and love,

leadonna

April Day 4

It's a beautiful spring day here in North Carolina!  It's going to be in the mid 70's today and that makes me incredibly happy!  I plan to sit in the sun for a bit and soak up some natural vitamin D.  I need it after this past winter.  We've had a lot of rain here, far more than normal, and it has left me feeling drained. So, like the flowers popping up around me, I'm going to enjoy the sun and bloom a little!

This is from my Quote Journal.  (Did you know Jim Carrey paints?  He's really quite talented, a little out there at times, but, what else is new?)  This spread was super easy and fast.  I used Onyx Black Archival Ink and stamped the Stampendous Ranunculus Field stamp across the two pages to create my field of flowers.  Next I simply used my Kuretake Gansai Tambi Watercolors to paint the page.  I printed out my quote, cut it up and inked the edges with some Memento Lady Bug Ink and glued them on.  Easy peasy!

Thanks for stopping by!

peace and love,

leadonna

April Day 3

Today I feel like sharing a simple little painting I did of the Bode Island Lighthouse.  I love the beach.  I feel so at peace there, like each wave is coming for a worry and taking it away.  The fresh smell of the salty air cleanses my soul.  The breeze whips my hair into a tangled mess and causes my baby hairs to curl into little tendrils around my face.  The sun warms my skin and removes all of the winter chill I dislike so much.  The sand between my toes alternates between warm and cool as I push my feet deeper digging a little hole.

When I look at this little painting, these are all of the feels that wash over me like a wave.  No, there's no actual beach shown.  No, you don't see the water.  Still, I know it's there.  I know what's on the other side of that marsh.  I've felt that sand and that breeze and that sun.  I've watched that water.  Isn't it amazing that one little painting can bring back so many wonderful feelings?  Isn't that why we create art?  To share our feelings.  To show the world visually what we can't always say with words.  Or maybe just to reminds ourselves of a beautiful experience or feeling, even if we don't share it with others.

I know it's not perfect but it reminds me of a perfect place and that's all that matters.   Maybe it will warm you up a little too!  Have a wonderful day!

peace and love,
leadonna

April Day 2

It's day 2 of Effy Wild's Artfully Wild Blog Along challenge.  I thought I would share a page from my Quote Journal.  This is just a small Dylusions journal that I started a short while back that I'm using for my favorite quotes that make me happy.  Something that when I'm feeling blue, I can pick it up and look through it and feel better.

I plan to leave my Quote Journal to my granddaughter, Emmaline.  When I've filled the pages, I want to write a special message just to her.  This way, she'll always have a bit of me with her and hopefully she'll cherish it as much as I cherish her.  I want her to always remember our times together creating art.

The head is a digital stamp from Vera Lane Studios (you can find her on Etsy) and the body is just paper I collaged into arms and a body shape.  The background is various inks from Memento and the circles were lids I used like stamps.  I printed the quote from the computer, cut it up, and inked it.  I added my flowers and some Stickles and, voilà!  Oh, and the head was colored with Prismacolor pencils.

This time of year, when the flowers start blooming, it always lifts my spirit and makes me happier.  There is a lot of truth to this quote!  I hope you have a wonderful day!  Thanks for stopping by!

peace and love,

leadonna

<3

April Fools

I've accepted a challenge by Effy Wild to blog every day in April.  How foolish of me!  I don't know what I was thinking because typing right now is quite painful.  I had wrist surgery on January 8th and everything was going fine until I turned a doorknob a couple of weeks ago and felt a very sharp pain. I don't know exactly what happened in my wrist, but, something ain't right!  It hurts!  I go to see my surgeon on April 8th and hopefully he can figure out what happened and fix it.  Preferably without another surgery!  Anyway, I've accepted the challenge, I will do my best to complete it.

The wrist issue has also interfered with my art.  It's hard to draw and paint right now but my soul is screaming at me to do it anyway.  It's like a damn Nike commercial playing in my head, "Just do it!"  So I sketch but I'm not painting.  I'm scared to mess up the sketch that I've fallen in love with.  How silly is that?  The "what ifs" have taken up residence in my brain.  What if I totally fuck it up?  What if I can't get the skin tones just right?  What if I can make the bubbles look the way I see them in my head?  What if it sucks?  I hate the "what ifs."  They suck!

I know it's only a journal page, but, it's a piece of me.  I put my heart into it.  I went back into my mind to my childhood for this journal spread.  I take ownership.  So, the perfectionist in me joins forces with the "what ifs" and it becomes a stalemate.  It sits and it mocks me because it's incomplete.  It is my "Circle of Art."  

How the hell do I break out of this vicious circle?  How do I abolish the "what ifs" for good?  I really want to learn to create and not worry about perfection.  I want to create for the sake of creating.  I want to get my hands all painty and messy and just enjoy the process.  I wish I could let my inner child come out to play, but, the truth is, she wasn't much fun.  That's a whole other story for another time.

love and peace,

leadonna

I'm Back!

Since my daddy passed away, I've been in a really weird place.  It's time to come back to being me.  I know there are questions that will never be answered.  I know there are conversations he and I will never have.  There are hurts that will never completely heal.  Yes, it hurts, but, I'm going to have to be okay with that.  I know in my heart that he loved me even when he really didn't know how or couldn't.  I'm going to survive this like I have survived many other difficult times in my life.  I am a survivor.  God has blessed me with so many wonderful things, I need to find my way back to gratitude for His grace.  I have children who love me and need me to here for them, not mentally and emotionally somewhere else.  They need more than my physical presence!  I have no doubt that they know I love them and would give my life for them but they need their momma back.  I still have some things to work out in my head and to deal with and that's going to take some time, I'm okay with that.  The main thing is, I'm back!  I'm going to hurt.  I'm going to cry.  I'm going to miss my daddy like crazy.  I'm going to be okay.  Thank You, God, for Your grace and love.  Thank You for wrapping me safely in the wings of an angel while I heal inside.  Thank You for being You!

Dear Death,

You suck!  Losing my dad has been a heart wrenching experience.  I don't feel the same anymore.  I cry a lot.  I've lost interest in so many things yet I have to continue to be and do.  It's hard..  I'm now officially an orphan if an adult can be such a thing.  My mother's death when I was 4 was difficult to say the least.  It's funny, since her death I've always felt like an orphan anyway.  My dad wasn't around, he was in the Navy and at sea and not interested in raising a daughter.  As an adult, I never had the courage to ask him why.  I just tried to accept that that was his choice at the time as painful as it was for me.  No kid likes to feel like their only surviving parent doesn't want them.  When I found out he told my third step-mother he didn't think I was his, well, needless to say that was like a kick in the teeth.  Now I'll never get to ask him why, Death has cheated me out of answers.